Love & Hip Hop Atlanta Recap: Season 1 Ep. 5

Love & Hip Hop Atlanta Recap: Season 1 Ep: 4

2012 BET AWARDS

Opening Act: GOOD MUSIC & Kanye....Yo! Kanye did a 3 min freestyle at the end with no music & dropped the mic when he was done!! HOT PERFORMACE!! #PASS!!

The Host: Samuel L. did a decent job...the rap with Spike Lee was funny & the Hollywood Husbands thing was ok (a lil on the Yawntastic side though) And I know I wasn't wishing Sam would've just said "FUCK
ALL LIS MAN!!" & let Kevin Hart take over as Host!! LMAOOOOOOO!! Overall though, he wasn't that bad...PASS!!

The Awards: For the most part, the winners was spot on!! Loved when Beyonce "beat up" JayZ when he & Kanye won over her!! Too cute but I declare that today's  R&B is on LIFE SUPPORT with those Nominees!!
:-( And while Nikki Garage may have won best Female Hip Hop artist 3 years in a row, let's be CRYSTAL FUCKIN CLEAR about the fact that Missy, Eve, or Lauryn Hill ain't put an album out during the last 3
years  either!!  And when that SQUISH FACED, SILICON INJECTED, BOOT MOUF TART yelled on stage that, "Niggas need to step their dick game up!" I wanted to STRANGLE her Ratched Ass!! Rosa Parks texted me from Heavan and said, "Really Sexcee, I sat on the FRONT of the bus for this kinda COONERY? THE FUCK?" LMAO!! #FAIL

The Performances: Kanye, Frankie Beverly & Mase (the tribute & the actual group), Melanie Fiona, Chante Moore with the Donna Summer Tribute, & The Whitney Tribute with Cissy Houston sanging with not a dry eye in the House including Souljah Boy who looked like a Sad Cracked Out Thingee from Harry Potter, all #PASS On the other hand, Usher & dem PINK ASS BOOTS *_*, Nikki Garage just makes me VOMIT, D'Angelo & his 27 piece Lace Front & a voice that sounded like he's been chewing BATH SALTS O_o, Val Simpson's feather bangs & her Cancer having ponytail of braids sounded like she was gargling rocks instead of singing, Chris Brown & the Body Paint & Auto Tuned voice, Rick Ross & Maybach Music, & Tyga were all "Blah".

Anybody else was not memorable as I can't recall!! LMAOOOOO!! Overall #FAIL-YER!!

Love & Hip Hop Atlanta Recap: Season 1 Ep. 3

Do yall be on pins & needles waiting for this half scripted fuckery like me?? CTFUUUUU!! Shoot me...I love to be entertained by Must See Ratchet TV!!

So we pick up where we left off with Stevie J & Joseline having a convo in which she tells him she's preggers with his baby & she'll take him for 50% of his coins!! King Ding-a-Ling once again throws on
his "Asshole" shades & tells her she can get 50% of DeezNutz!! CTFUUUUUUUU!! I don't give a damn what yall think, that shit was CLASSIC!!

K. Michelle gets a REAL SHIT review of her career from both, her producer & her potential mananger, HEAVY HITTERS, B. Cox & Jeff Robinson, respectively!!!! They both inform her that goings FEDS on
studio execs was NOT A GOOD LOOK & she gon have to do more than SANG to prove herself!! She did a showcase & baby got PIPES!! But Girlfriend also got DRAMA!! So it turns out that the heffa KarlyRedd
is a HOTT MESS EXPRESS!! Did this wanch start SOME MO shit between Stevie J & Mimi at a K.Michelle event?? She shole did when she pointed out some chick he supposedly had shaboinked!! But did she really go up to B. Cox & tell him he fuckin wit the wrong artist?? Yes she did...and that my friend is how you end up on TMZ pickin yo FACE UP OFF DA CONCRETE making that goofy ass white boy with the long hair rewind that shit like 50-leven times!!


Rasheda's storyline is just like them Malnutritioned Braids in her head...makes my TEEFUS itch!! Her dude is tryna be REALISTIC about her shitty career & she has a stank ass  attitude!! I predict her album
sales will go Triple Aluminum Foil!!

And yall, I really like Erica but she pissing me off thinking that Lil Scrappy wanna be in a monogomous relationship but IS MOVING OUT!! He said she gives him the L & the E but not the OV....translation, Erica
don't give head!! Chile, all the fishnet stockings, footrubs, & candles in America ain't gone keep that man they way a Schedule of Monthly Blow Jobs & some tacos will!! I'm just sayin  Booski...step ya game up & learn da thumb trick!! ;-)

Stevie J got drunk & wanted to fuck MiMi in a headlock at K. Michelle's Showcase coming to the table by demanding a kiss. When she refused, he was pissed that Erica clowned him & so in TRUE ASSHOLE
FASHION he insulted her & called her a bitch all the while MiMi was logged on to LetShitHappenInMyFace.com!! It's cool though cause Lil Scrappy PROMISED he gon put PAWS on dude!!


Anywhos & hoes, after watching this crazy shit last night, I am CONVINCED that Joseline, who's accent sound like a combo of Spanish, Ebonics, & Retardation, is the MAIN BITCH & Mimi (#failing BIG TIME
this week) is the side bitch!!  She confronts MiMi & tell her she preggers by King Ding-A-Ling with a Baby Ding-A-Ling in her STOMACH!! And what does MiMi do, sticks her head in the sand like a Ostrich wit
Sars!! She gets up and leave & Stevie throws a drink in Joseline's face reducing her to feel like the PIECE OF SHIT she REALLY is for fuckin with a man that's NOT HERS!!


They HASH it out and I would tell yall what happened but I couldn't understand shit she was Saying...sounded like a Jamacain ASS Rainman!!  #FAIL

Until next week...LOVE, PEACE, & BLUE MAGIC HAIR GREASE!!  ;-)